Let’s pretend this is easy

I could have continued on my roller coaster ride and kept it all to myself. I am here because I want the world to stop pretending….pretending that things are easy and short cuts are real. If you purchase a waist cincher I guarantee the biggest change you are going to see will be in your bank account if you don’t implement other changes. 

Are you feeling motivated today? Let’s pretend you are going to wake up like this everyday, you are going to be motivated and do everything you set out to do perfectly. You are going to drink cayenne pepper lemonade drinks, eat celery and chicken, (because that’s how you get skinny fast) won’t ever cheat on your diet and workout 30 minutes a day. Then a magical fairy will come down from the heavens and stop you from feeling as hungry as a ravishing bear just out of hibernation. You wake up one day (like a week later, because that’s how fast we want to see results) looking exactly how you want to….everything is perfect! Because there is such thing as feeling fully satisfied for us women. 😏 Anyone care to stop me?

I’m here to support women by letting them know, hey you’re not alone. It’s totally normal to feel good about yourself, totally guilty about eating food and beat yourself up all within a span of 5 minutes. We are crazy, yes I’ll admit it I’m not normal, but at least I’m not alone in my crazy and neither are you. The part that is often neglected when it comes to reaching weight loss goals is the mental anguish we put ourselves through. I want to help you feel good about yourself at this very moment while you look in that mirror, while slowly working towards what you want to achieve. Slow down the mental beat up, throw the diet out the window (no celery, lemonade fads here) we’ll get more into “dieting” later. Stop! don’t pick up all those cupcakes and still think the results will magically appear, it still takes work. You will have to change things, slowly.  You won’t go from eating rice and beans to lettuce and fish overnight, the best thing is you don’t have to. Carbs are not evil gremlins that make you fat, they are necessary. Losing weight is a process, It’s going to be a long time before you even think anything is happening and even then you won’t be satisfied because you don’t see it but others will. I’m just here to cheer you along the way.

Do you happen to follow any fitness models on Instagram, thinking this is going to inspire you to work out then realize these women have no idea what it’s like to be chunky or considered obese and their biggest battle is trying to eat more because they can’t πŸ˜’ . How encouraging is it really for you to see the perfectly shaped abs. Does it really make you feel good about yourself, or shameful? guilty? Because you don’t always make the best choices and sometimes when you’re out with your kids you want some fries too, oh wait that’s me, not you. I love food, my biggest battle is NOT putting food in my mouth. I am learning along the way, I’ve fallen more times than I can count. I’ve also succeeded, yes I’ve had abs…actually we all have them they are just in hibernation waiting for you. I’m here to support your battle against yourself and to create awareness of common pitfalls when embarking on a fitness journey. I won’t stop until it’s done in a balanced fun way.

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Domino effect

The other day, I was beating myself up a bit because I made some not so great choices on the weekend. You know summer time beer and weekends they go great together. I woke up late and in a rush of course I didn’t peep my food on the weekend I was too busy having fun and didn’t have time to prep food in the morning or have breakfast. As a result I didn’t really make the best choice for lunch, I was ordering out and I didn’t want healthy food I was craving Thai. I was also starving, so on impulse I allowed my taste buds to decide instead of my brain.  Plus it was really busy so I didn’t have time to workout because I didn’t get a break during the day. I didn’t want to workout because I was tired and talking negatively to myself (these habits are taking work to break). My brain and body were having an intense battle. YES, NO, YES, NO.  After I finished a long stressful day at work around almost 9pm….I said fuck it I’m just working out. And I started and I feel so much better and I’m glad I did. If I would have not just done it, I would have just continued a perpetual cycle of feeling bad and guilty and not doing anything about it. Then I realized that this is perfectly normal. It’s all part of the process, shit is not always going to be perfect…it’s the choice you make at that time that matters not what happened before. Make the choice, make it happen…not tomorrow…TODAY!

Celebrate the win

This morning as I was starting my day I weighed myself, now why did I decide to put myself through that mental anguish? I am well aware that the number on the scale does not matter. I am a massochist, so it seems.

 Of course being displeased with the number I saw beneath me dragged me right into another activity which does nothing to benefit me….beat up. You know all those lovely thoughts I had about myself

“I should have been farther”

“Maybe if I was stricter with my eating”

“Why isn’t it happening faster”

“I’m still fat”

Should I go on? 

Then as I was brushing my teeth feeding myself this garbage, I looked at my reflection as I washed my face and it clicked. As I stared at my face, I looked a little different. I could see it in my face. I’ve lost 20lbs since beginning, even with me not being completely consistent the  last few months but its 20lbs!! I was overjoyed! In that moment I reminded myself that I just have to stay consistent…that’s my goal. Often times we are so consumed with the way things should go, that we forget to celebrate the small wins. Celebrate every win….you went to the gym, you ate broccoli, turned down greasy food, told yourself you’re pretty, thought something positive. Whatever it is celebrate it and keep on celebrating because before you know it you’ll be where you want to be. One chicho dissapears at a time, but meanwhile love those chichos 😜 

Love Your Curvas

For many the question is if you love your curvas why are you trying to change? 

Love your curvas is not a size, it’s about embracing who you are…the curves that define your body. Whether it’s perceived as big or small. It doesn’t mean you can’t work towards fitness goals, or stay as you are if that’s what you’d like…just be comfortable in your own skin. 

Loving yourself through whatever journey you are on. Having a healthy mindset and feeling beautiful regardless of the number on the back of their jeans.

Healthy Hugs

Magic Pill

Entering day 23 feeling pretty good, the scale has not changed dramatically but I’m fitting into some of my old shirts, I haven’t gotten into the pants yet but I’m being patient; it will come. I think one of the hardest things (besides eating less 😝) about weight loss or physical transformation is waiting and trusting that what you are doing is actually working. I think this goes for other things as well, we are always so certain things will go wrong. We are constantly looking for shortcuts to achieve the results we want because we want everything right NOW! We are evolving into a society where instant gratification is what we are accustomed to. 

With this process part of the learning or re-learning is that there is no shortcut, no instant gratification. The magic pill is hard work and persistence. If you need reassurance take progress pics every 2 weeks, you’ll see a difference even if perceived as a minor one. 

“The tiny seed knew that in order to grow, it needed to be dropped in the dirt, covered in darkness, and struggle to reach the light” – Sandra Kring 

We are like the tiny seed, no matter what life throws at you, stay focused on your growth. Trust yourself, trust the process. One day at a time.

Healthy Hugs

Jaq

MotivationΒ 

so I noticed that most of the time when I write I’m in a “bad place” I guess it’s because being able to express myself makes me feel better when I’m in those situations. Just an interesting observation. 

Well on 7/15/15 I signed up to The Ultimate Oxygen Challenge, (http://www.oxygenmag.com/90daychallenge

it’s a 90 day challenge that comes with exercises, recipes, meal plan etc. I chose #TeamAmanda because I am a huge fan of Amanda Latona and have been following her for at least 10 years she has always been one of my favorite fitness role models. Plus she is the booty queen πŸ‘ΈπŸ½πŸ‘ what lady doesn’t want some amazing ASSets πŸ˜‰.

 I’ve been searching for balance since I decided to take a break after my first competition and I haven’t been able to find it. Quite honestly I haven’t put 100% into anything yet, well I did somewhat following iifym and was getting results, but like most people got thrown off track when I took a vacation. I am still using this approach during the challenge and it’s what I love the most about it, it’s real life! Not a cookie cutter diet or starvation. 

Today is day 19 I’ve seen some changes although nothing major on the scale which can be a little frustrating but I am being patient because I know it could be muscle. This takes time! I am embracing this new found motivation. Plus it really helps that we have a page and a lot of women are engaged so we motivate one another. Which brings me to something important, it’s easy to get derailed when doing something on your own, or you feel alone. This is not easy, find or create a group for accountability by e-mail or text. I created a text group to motivate some other friends while I am doing this challenge too. Everyone needs support. If you don’t know anyone maybe take up classes at the local gym or hire a trainer. If it’s important to you find a way! 

I’ll be updating soon

Healthy kisses 😘 I believe in you! 

Despair

I can’t wait to feel like I felt before. To fit into my old clothes that do not remember me anymore. I can’t wait until I look in the mirror satisfied with what I see. Although that’s never been the case, I’ve never been 100% content. Why the torture? Hard to climb out  this feeling feeds me, keeping me confined in a dungeon of sorrow. 

Continuing this same story in my head, will never help me out, instead it will keep me right where I am. Stagnant, defeated…..unmotivated. So how can I climb out? 

Fight! Fight with all my might. No matter what goes on in my head, I’ve realized that to change I have to outsmart myself. 

Our bodies have adapted to “comfort” and will try everything possible to keep us  where we are. Because as much as you want to change….you don’t like change….no one likes change. To get to where you want to go you have to be uncomfortable and who embraces being uncomfortable?  In comfort you don’t grow, only when you step out of your routines, habits will you expand and then transform.

Dissapointed Distracted Discouraged

Waking up in the morning, staring at your puffy face is not the best start to your day. Come on admit it, you’ve had days like this, maybe several ones where you notice your heaviness. This is the ugly part of this battle, the one no one speaks of. Not feeling so great or motivated to stay disciplined . The emotions don’t quietly go away, the feelings increase throughout the rest of your day slowly draining any good thoughts you could have. You go to put on clothes and notice they feel a little too tight, now you’re really upset. Have your coffee or tea starting the day off in a really terrible mood but not completely aware why. Before leaving stare at your workout clothes and wonder why even bother working so hard if the results don’t show. 

Stop….

Grasp your conciousneas before this avalanche of pity submerges you. It’s not going to be easy, how will you feel once you get that workout? So what if it’s been 3 days, a week a month, a year that you haven’t been consistent. Fight this feeling with awareness, don’t go with it. Overcome it by taking action. Even if you become distracted and dissapointed or discouraged in a few days. Do it again and again until you beat it. 

It’s not an easy battle, for some it may be simple to execute. It’s not about it being easy, nothing is ever easy. It’s about looking at your puffy face and telling it it’s ok and you are beautiful anyway but you’re changing this! 

Shame Shame

When I am in my struggle to be fit, my biggest battle is with food. I get bored easily and eating the same basic foods can get boring. It’s one of the reasons why I hate restrictions, another reason is because I love food especially pizza πŸ˜‡

So I flaunt when I eat healthy and feel so proud of myself πŸ’ͺ🏽 & anything I eat that I “am not supposed” to eat I eat in hiding or with friends that really don’t care. What is the shame in eating? 

The other day I went to whole foods during my lunch break to get a “healthy bite” I was really hungry…..hungry enough to allow my stomach to bypass my brain in choice making and decide on its own. There it was staring back at me boneless fried chicken and Mac & cheese, I felt so guilty even considering it….then I asked for it. Let’s pause for a second….I live in NYC and out of all places for southern cooking….I know…I know…really? From whole foods? Should have thought it through a little better.  For a moment I contemplated about eating it there so no one at work would see me, but I didn’t. I walked into my office and took everything out the bag, I noticed my office door cracked open so I got up to close it. Just when I thought I was safe, my employee walks in and sees the plate and made some snarky comment about my food choice. I could feel my cheeks the tint of beets and I felt so ashamed for a few minutes, I just wanted to blend into the walls. I pondered about that emotion, why the guilt? the shame? It’s only food! 

This gave me the realization of a few things:

When hungry you don’t make the best choices.

Preparation is king.

When making a decision and realizing at the moment it may not be the best choice and you still go with it….enjoy every single bite! 

Give yourself a break, stop the beat up. There is nothing to be ashamed of. Embrace the journey.

Stuck

I think everyone reaches a point where no matter how much exercise you complete, the number on the scale is not budging. Not only is it frustrating, it’s discouraging….it makes you feel like just picking up that pint of ice cream and making love to the spoon. That does sound good, doesn’t it? 

Ok enough with the pity party and feeling frustrated, did you truly eat balanced all week? Or did you over indulge? Did you exercise consistently like you said you would or did you skip out on workouts and make excuses. 

We are quick to get down on ourselves, instead of taking a good look and asking ourselves did I do everything possible today or this week to stick to my goals? What worked? What did not work? 

We expect the results without the work…well this week or month may not have gotten you the results expected but the great thing is tommorow is a new day, what are you going to do with it?